The quiet shift i didn't see coming

It’s been almost two months since my last blog post, which I’m very aware of. One day I’ll write an entire entry about procrastination, self-drive, and how even spiritually inclined people can avoid sitting down to write. But for now, let’s just pretend this gap was intentional ;-)

When I moved to Macao alone, it turned out to be far less intimidating than I had imagined. Once I settled in, it actually felt… easy. I stepped into an amazing new job, met wonderful colleagues, and quickly found my rhythm. I was travelling, enjoying the country, enjoying the work, really flourishing. Macao suited me. I had a beautiful home, a little car I could zip around in, and a very full life. I worked long hours, yes, but I genuinely liked what I was doing. On paper, everything was exactly as it should be.

Sometime after being in Macau for a while, settled, comfortable, and firmly in a routine, a quiet nudge appeared. Not dramatic. Not mystical. Just a simple thought: Maybe I should find a metaphysical store. I wanted to keep exploring what I’d started in Dubai; Reiki, angels, spirits, energy. They were all topics that fascinated me.

That’s how I found a wonderful holistic centre in Hong Kong, just a ferry ride away. Close enough to be somewhat practical (about two hours door to door and crossing an international border), but far enough to feel like a mini escape. I started going on weekends, taking whatever courses were on offer — Egyptian healing, channelled teachings, oracle card workshops. I completed my Reiki Master level there, stocked up on crystals, and slowly built a collection of oracle cards (not an easy feat back then). Mostly though, it just felt right. Studying these things sparked a genuine passion in me that I hadn’t felt in a long time.

Gradually, this world began to take up more mental space than my corporate job. During the week I was fully “on” at work, but my interest and energy were shifting. One unexpected change was that I simply stopped drinking alcohol. No big declaration, no rules, I just understood how much effort it took to keep my energy balanced and clear. One drink meant days of re-aligning, and honestly, I didn’t think it was worth it.

There was no single turning point. No spiritual thunderbolt. It all built quietly. I began travelling abroad to attend workshops with teachers I’d read for years — Doreen Virtue, Diana Cooper, Wayne Dyer, Brian Weiss, Caroline Myss, to name a few. Each experience added another layer, another question, another subtle shift.

At the same time, my job started to feel… flat. Still challenging, still intense and diverse, still something I did well, but no longer exciting. The spark I’d felt when I first arrived, slowly faded. Not for the country itself — I still adore Macao — but for the corporate work I was doing day in and day out.

That’s when the doubts crept in. Maybe this isn’t my path anymore. Maybe I’m done with corporate life. It’s been nearly twenty years. At the time though, I couldn’t tell if I was bored with the job, the place, or simply feeling a bit lonely. So I did what many of us do: I looked only outward, and blamed the location and loneliness.

In hindsight, this was a perfect example of moving cities in the hope that everything would change, while carrying the same unresolved questions inside.

I resigned and moved back to Dubai, familiar, comfortable, safe. At the time, it felt like the logical next step. With hindsight, I can see it was less about moving forward and more about retreating to what I knew. Awareness often arrives later!

Leaving Macao wasn’t easy. I left with new skills, deeper spiritual knowledge, meaningful professional relationships, and a genuine love for Asia. It was no small decision. Still, I packed up everything — both practical and energetic — and went back to Dubai.

Looking back now, I can see that I was still searching for myself. Externally, Macao had been a success. Internally, something remained unsettled. I tried to resolve it by studying more, learning more, doing more. When I arrived in Dubai, I initially stayed with a friend and immediately began thinking about my next corporate role.

At the same time, I was beginning — very tentatively — to practice Reiki and oracle readings on friends. Casually. Inconsistently. Very much on the side. And with a great deal of nervousness!

At no point did I think this would become my work. I still believed my path was corporate, just perhaps in a different form.

What I didn’t know then was that those next two years in Dubai would be my final chapter in the corporate world.